The increase in school activites, admin for new school places and general chaos that the school holidays brings can be stressful for many parents.
Navigating school holidays can be tricky for families that all live under one roof, but for separated parents or those with more complicated blended families, things can become difficult when parents do not see eye-to-eye.
Our Divorce and Family Lawyers at Lamb Brooks often see an increase in phone calls from clients during the school holidays as tempers can be frayed and parents will often find themselves in disagreements over child contact arrangements.
Common difficulties for separated parents in the holidays
Some common arguments can centre around:
- Which parent is going to cover additional expenses of holiday clubs and childcare
- Disagreements on parents taking children abroad
- Unfair distribution of time with the children
- Juggling work commitments through the summer holidays
- Disputes about school choices
- Differences in parenting styles and disruption of routines
What if you cannot agree on arrangements?
Planning ahead of time is often key to a smooth and peaceful 6 weeks’ holiday. But often life is busy and changeable. A written timetable agreed in plenty of time before the schools break up can help parents to make their childcare arrangements and plan their summer. So get started on this sooner rather than later!
If you are at your wits end and need some legal advice over the summer holidays, then please get in touch with our understanding and experienced team of Family Solicitors who can help you find a way forward.
A solicitor will be able to advise you of your parental rights (there is a lot of false information and misconceptions around this topic), help you understand the best route forward and be by your side should you need to take further action such as issuing proceedings or putting a contact order in place.
5 Tips for Coparenting in Summer Holidays
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Be Courteous
It is important to be fair and reasonable when making your arrangements for the school holidays. Make sure that time is shared equally where possible and that everyone is getting what they want from the school break – both parents and the children.
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Avoid Confrontation
If you are struggling to get along with your ex-partner and are having heated disagreements, try to calm matters down and avoid speaking negatively in front of the children. Stress or negativity can filter through to children and cause deeper issues. Children should feel secure and happy throughout the summer break, particularly if the separation is quite fresh and the going between two homes is still new for them. Try to have difficult conversations out of ear-shot or communicate via email.
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Prepare to be Flexible
Even if you have a plan of action, things do change and you may need to adapt. Unforeseeable events might come up or you might find that you are let down with childcare or your children change their mind, i.e. staying an additional night with one parent or making plans with friends. Whilst a solid plan is beneficial it also helps to be open to change.
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Be Organised
Ensure that your schedules are synced and make sure your diary or calendar is updated. There are some useful apps and smartphone features for separated parents to keep each other up to date and in the loop with key dates and appointments. Make sure that pick ups and drop offs are communicated clearly to avoid confusion. It is also worthwhile checking that the children have everything they will need when going back and forth between two houses – especially if you live far apart from each other.
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Be Mindful of the Children
The holidays can be a joyous occasion for children, but a long six weeks for parents. Children will be out of their usual routine, often staying up late and perhaps misbehaving, making a mess and getting ‘bored’. Try to be patient and remind yourself that there are only a few summers of fun before children are grown up. When the rules differ from home to home, this can cause friction between separated parents, so make sure that you communicate with each other and try to come to agreements on things like bedtimes, homework and healthy diets.
Legal Advice from a Family Lawyer
If you need some guidance on your divorce, separation, finances or contact with children then please get in touch with our well-regarding Family Law Team at Lamb Brooks.
We have a number of qualified, dedicated family lawyers who are ready to help you find a positive way forward for you and your family.
Call us on 01256 844888, email enquiries@lambbrooks.com or alternatively you can speak to our online chat assistant or complete a form on our website to put you in touch with the best person to assist you.
Other blogs you may be interested in:
When Can a Contact Centre Help Your Family
Secrets for Coming to Terms With Divorce
Separated Parents: Overcoming Disputes Over Schools
Separated Parents: How to Have a Peaceful Handover
The contents of this article are for the purposes of general awareness only. They do not purport to constitute legal or professional advice. The law may have changed since this article was published. Readers should not act on the basis of the information included and should take appropriate professional advice upon their own particular circumstances.